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Dan Fogler For President

Dan Fogler For President

In what can only be described as a surprise, Mr. Dan Fogler, known primarily as a comedic actor in films like FANBOYS, Take Me Home Tonight and Balls of Fury has recently announced his bid for President of the United States of America. His official statement follows...

"I believe this country needs a colonoscopy. We have to think out side of an ancient system that may have worked 100 years ago but now it is obsolete and failing us. There is power in numbers. If we can band together and rethink this corporate dictatorship then there will be no need for money and no want for food- it is the system that has let us down. From the president on down to the smallest cog in this rusty wheel. I'm offering a new dimension. Follow me. Break on through to the other side!"
-I'm Dan Fogler and I approve this message.

Since the announcement Mr. Fogler's detractors have come out in full force with accusations that he “knows nothing of politics”, questioning his intelligence suggesting that “he can't even spell large words or do long devision without asking for help” and reporting that his family is not fully supportive of his run. The following is supposedly a quote from Fogler's grandmother "I caught him with strippers doing gravity bong hits in my bathroom when he was 16!"

Dan Fogler For PresidentWe caught up with Dan earlier this week and he certainly seems to be taking all of the insults and attacks in stride saying “Look, I get it. People see me and think What is this shmuck doing? What is with the Hollywood types thinking they know how to run our country? But, here is the truth about me. I'm running on a platform of peace and happiness. I want to turn our country into a freakin' hippy commune.”

When asked about the accusations of his drug use he replied “People are saying things like I once took so much acid that I ripped open a hole in the space time continuum, which would have been awesome, but it's just not true. And yeah, I smoke pot but when I become president I want to keep it illegal because I believe the government will ruin the quality. Unless I made myself official taste tester... hmm let me get back to you on that one- I'll be on that fence over there shmokin' a big ole bowl“

Asked if he had a faith life or if he belonged to any religious organizations his response was short “I had a bar mitzvah but the only one I pray to is the god of Rock & Roll.”

Dan Fogler For PresidentIn a recent press conference Fogler randomly blurted out, "I think being an oddball is good I mean sure I ridicule children openly in public and I may or may not be a cyborg but isn't that more interesting than being a rich Christian dude who went to an Ivy league college?! Oh you'll understand when you're older!”

Mr. Fogler may be an unusual candidate but he truly believes he is the man to shake things up. He says, “In a lot of ways I am a normal American. I'm fat, I'm hairier than most of the animal kingdom, I believe in UFO conspiracy theories, I like rainbows, I make stupid faces on movie posters and I'm a blatant self promoter. These are all things the average American can relate to. But I'll also bring a new perspective and energy to this great nation. I'm impervious to pain and I am a knighted Jedi warrior. Could you ask for a better combination for President? I could end all potential terrorist attacks with a simple Jedi mind trick. I've also got a huge amount of wisdom on my side. I found the ark of the covenant. I've got it in my storage unit in Brooklyn. Plus, I lived in a tree for six months reading Eckhart Tolle. Need I say more?”

So, this November it looks like we have a choice beyond the two party system. A vote for Fogler is a vote for real change. And, sure there will be anarchy for a minute but maybe that is exactly what this country needs.

For more information on Mr. Fogler and his campaign you can follow him on twitter @mrdanfogler, like him on facebook facebook.com/danfogler, check him out on funny-or-die funnyordie.com/followfogler, read his official campaign blog followfogler.tumblr.com or visit his website dan-fogler.com


Latest Presidential News


DAN FOGLER PRESIDENTIAL AD CAMPAIGN
Presidential hopeful, Dan Fogler, beats his opponents to the punch line with this campaign ad.


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STOP THE PRESSES!
Chewbacca 2012
Presidential Candidate, Dan Fogler, announces his running mate will be none other than Chewbacca. This is the first time in American history that a two species ticket is running for the highest office in the land. When asked how he felt about his VP nom Chewbacca said “AAAAAARRGGGGHHH”. Long time pal Han Solo, had the following to say, “It’s not wise to upset a Wookie”. Words of warning to anyone planning to attack these United States? Perhaps. Fogler’s choice makes sense to those closest to the campaign who feel that choosing Chewbacca draws attention to Dan’s support of equal rights and his understanding that the world we live in is more than just International… it’s Intergalactic.
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COMEDY CENTRAL'S INDECISION
Comedy Central's Indecision Forever asks Dan Fogler a few questions about his political life. read more...
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EXAMINER INTERVIEW
The Examiner.com posted an interview "Back Stage with The Dan Fogler For President Campaign". read more...
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Dan Fogler For President Dan Fogler For President


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